Month: February 2011

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Job hunting

I have been job hunting for the last few weeks or so but I have really put it into over drive in the last few days. I want to find something before we run out of school money and don’t have anything to fall back on. Not that we are a few dollars of running out of money but it would be nice to not get that way. I enjoy not working but I am a big girl and I know I need too. On the plus side we don’t have rent or anything like that due to the fact I own my trailer. That helps a ton.

But the normal bills do get heavy at times, electric the last three months have been $225+, water which is around $25, cable/internet $83 a month and lot rent which is $75 a month. SO really are bills aren’t to bad. That doesn’t include mine or his cellphone since that is daily living bills or car insurance.

I know it will be hard to work part time and go to school full time but I do have Kyle now and that makes all the difference in the world. 🙂 He is amazing about helping here. He does all the dishes and all the trash which includes the litter box. And I do laundry and vacuuming and what not. It’s a pretty even trade. He also will be taking care of the lawn this year. That in itself will totally be nice. 😀 I am so thankful I have him. It makes this life thing a little easier when you share some of the pains of life with someone.

Anyway, I need to do my other web page project for school. I already did my Database homework. Kyle is working on the Excel homework. Which sucks because the harder of the three. But like I said, we share in the pain of life and that includes school.

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New look

Rawrz has a new look thanks to a couple of people, first Rose for her awesome tutorial on WP comments, then Hannah with her new layout that gave me some of my ideas to make this layout and then I used Aisling font for the headers and what not. I love this font, it looks so much like my own. 🙂 Then also I used Yusuke icons. It has finally came together.

I think it turned out pretty good. Please leave your comments.

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Cervical Dysplasia

Monday I found out I have cervical dysplasia, which if you don’t know is pre-cancerous cells on my cervix. Which means, if I don’t get it taken care of it will turn in to cancer. I’m scared to death.

I haven’t told but a handful of people, my family, Kyle’s family and my bestie. I don’t even know how to act or feel. I mean, it could be a whole lot worse but then again it could be better as well. I don’t even know. I want to tell myself this is all okay.

But I am scared of the treatment. Of scar tissue on my cervix and how hard it will be to get pregnant later down the road.

The treatment for this is called LEEP (loop electrosurgical excision procedure) and how it works is an electrically charged loop made of thin wire is inserted through the speculum and up to the cervix. As the loop is passed across the cervix, it cuts away a thin layer of surface tissue, removing the abnormal cells. This tissue will be later tested for cancer or abnormal cells. Finally, a medicated paste is applied to the area to prevent bleeding.

I am looking so forward to this. But whatever the case maybe, I have to have it done. Bottom line, I’m scared.

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Random note: 002

Just a random thought, I love how Kyle makes me feel beautiful no matter what. Even if my hair is crazy and I have been drooling in my sleep and have food stuck to the side of my face he still sees the best in me. I don’t think I have ever been this happy before! <3 True love at it's best! Thank you Kyle for being such an amazing person!