I was suppose to trust him

May 12

I am so hurt, so upset. I can’t even think right. I can not believe him. The one person I was suppose to trust.

I am such a stupid girl. Simply put. I knew better. I am stupid.

He should be getting it a lot worse. . . but I am being nice. I have no reason too.

This entry was posted on Monday May 12th, 2008 at 11:35 pm with the tags: , , , . You can view the comment feed. Both comments and pings are currently closed.

  1. Jenn – May 12, 2008 at 23:57

    What happened? 🙁

  2. Asshole – May 13, 2008 at 20:32

    I am an asshole. I am a cheating lying fuck. If thats what it takes to make you feel better then believe what you want. The truth is that i loved you with every inch of my heart and you couldn’t even leave me a lone to find help in a fucking mental hospital! I am a piece of shit but i did and still do love you. Go find the man who makes you happy because you never gave me a fucking chance, all you ever did was tell me how i fucked up and ran way from me when i wanted to talk to you and be with you so fine. I’m going to forget about you. I have a date tonight, you should go get a date as well and try not to fuck them on the first night! I do think you cheated on me. The fucking lame excuse that we werent together when you fucked greg is just that. A stupid fucking excuse and nothing more. I forgave you and held you and i may be crazy but i knew you were the one i loved and never once did i step out of our relationship unlike you. So maybe i deserve to die, or be unhappy forever but i truly wish you happiness and will love you for fucking ever. That is what i deserve, to live forever without the woman i love, so you win. I admit that i was wrong and i could have done better, but i didn’t , i did what i did and i cant take it back. You couldn’t just leave me alone when i didn’t want to be with you but i stayed and i loved you truly and never looked back and wished i hadn’t. I am glad for everyday and every minute that i had with you. I’m sorry everything has come to this. I’m sorry you hate me. I truly am. I said i’m sorry and i am out of your life. I cant do anything else.

  3. Asshole – May 13, 2008 at 21:09

    My date bailed so that should make you fucking happy. I wish nothing but good for you. You curse the ground i walk on. Leave all of my e-mails and stuff alone. I’m serious. How could you come to hate me so. I needed you and begged for your forgiveness and you spat in my face and looked for reasons to not love me. When you wanted my forgiveness i did not hesitate, I gave it to you befor you asked for it. I’m sorry i didn’t work for a while, i’m such a lazy piece of shit right. It wasn’t like i was going to school full time. But like you told me school was just a big fucking joke and it was easy. WTF ever!YOu never gave me a fucking chance to show you how much you meant to me. You were always guilting me because i went and saw my friends. ANd i gave them all up! For you. Because you were more important. I gave up everything for you. I was going to quit school, go get help, get a good job and start a life with you but that still wasn’t good enough. What the hell did you want from me. My life. Well you almost got that to. That day i found you and Greg i died.
    You were the one person i trusted and you betrayed me. I was so hurt and so upset i couldn’t even think right. I could not believe you. The one person i was supposed to trust.I am such a stupid boy. Simply put. I knew better. I am stupid.
    Sound familiar? YOu have no right to judge me and even now as i lay here crushed and beyond hope all i wish is tht you are happy. I don’t feel anger, or hate for you. Never have i truly felt that. I’ve said it because i was hurt and because i was angry but i never meant it. I want o you to have everything in life that makes you happy because you deserve it. YOu are a wonderful woman and if there were anyway i could make you believe that i loved you i would have found it but there is no getting through to you. You only see what you want and i cant help that. I loved you, your family and for a brief second in life i was happy but it wasn’t good enough for you was it. I didn’t want money. I liked our life together. All i needed was you and You only told me that i hated you and all i wanted you for was sex and money. God forbid i have any real emotions and love you because i saw things in you to love and you were beautiful to me inside and out and yet you only saw me as a monster. Nothing more than a free loading, good for nothing, cheating, lying horrible excuse for a man. I’m sorry my life was not where you wanted it to be. I’m sorry that i didn’t love you the way that you wanted. I don’t know any other way to love someone than unconditionally and that is all. I do love you. I always will. I hope one day we can be friends. I’m not as much of and asshole as you think i am.

  4. C – May 14, 2008 at 15:06

    Asshole, You are a stalker.

    You accuse my friend of not leaving you alone so you can get help but, who the hell is visiting her website to leave nasty ass comments?

    Your statements are so contradictory it is unbelievable.

    If you want the help you went for to be successful then you need to drop the past and move on.

    (Jen you know I had to say something I couldn’t just let it go)

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