Funeral home

July 27

I want to thank everyone that left/emailed really nice comments to me. It meant a lot. I miss my grandfather so much. It still doesn’t seem real. I sat at the funeral home with a blank face most of the time. I didn’t cry very much but just sat there. Maybe I would feel better if I did just cry but I can’t. I don’t cry very much. The service was very nice. I think my grandfather would have really liked it. He was buried in a white t-shirt, blue jeans and a ballcap. He looked like papaw but in a way he didn’t. It’s hard to really put it in to words.

My brother didn’t even get out of jail for it. Most of the time they will let you out for 72 hours and then make you go back. He didn’t get to even say goodbye. I think it has been almost 3 years since Raymond had seen papaw. :frown: I hate that for my brother. The last time I seen him was father’s day. I didn’t seem that long ago. I remember kissing him on the cheek and telling him I loved him before Keith and I left. 😐

I need to talk about something happier if not I will be sad forever. We finally got our tax check in. We bought ourselves some clothes that we needed very bad. We paid on some bills and we still have money to move in the next month or so. Keith is finally full-time now and everything seems well. We are doing good besides the funeral. Our lives are starting to fall into place. That makes me smile.

Judy took me to the Heath Department again to change birth control. The pills they put me on made me sick. They said it might of been since I’m so small. So, now I am trying this thing called NuvaRing. It looks really neat. I haven’t tried it out yet because I have to wait the Sunday after my period to use it. It is 99.7% effect with perfect use. The same as the pill. This is pretty good. I think. It looks like a rubber band and you have to keep it in for 3 weeks and then take it out the last week (the week of your period). Then I go back each month and get a new one. I think I will like it. All I can do is try, right?

Well, I am off. I have a lot of house cleaning to do. Being away for 3 days, you can really tell. Nathan and Keith did try. Which I am very greatful for.

This entry was posted on Wednesday July 27th, 2005 at 6:40 pm with the tags: , , . You can view the comment feed. Both comments and pings are currently closed.

  1. Jennifer – Jul 28, 2005 at 02:17

    Oh sweetie, I’m so sorry about your grandfather’s death. 🙁 I remember how I felt after my grandmother’s death. It was awful.
    *hug*

  2. Paige – Jul 29, 2005 at 15:09

    I’m super sorry about your grandfather. My grandfather passed away last year and it was tough. I couldn’t even go to the service because he lived in IOWA, and I live in Oregon. Soo..I was really sad. *sighs* I do hate it when people die. It’ll get better though after a little while, all you can do is live life like you always do and not ponder on things. Good luck on everything!

  3. Rach – Jul 29, 2005 at 18:22

    I’m so so sorry about your grandaddy. *Hug* I hope you can find a way to move on.

  4. Julie – Jul 29, 2005 at 23:02

    *HUGS* This is a very difficult time you’re going through. When my grandfather died a year ago I couldn’t cry for a while, then all of a sudden it just hit and it was horrible. Everyone deals with this differently, so dont’ force yourself to cry or to react in some way, just deal with it however your mind lets you.

  5. Mali – Jul 30, 2005 at 00:13

    Oh my goodness I’m so sorry about your grandfather. I hope that you recover, and that you get through this well. I’m also sorry that your brother couldn’t be there. I hop everything improves.

  6. Jenny – Jul 30, 2005 at 07:50

    oh wow. ive never had a relative i actually really cared about die… altho there have been some that… anyway. i hope you feel better. that really blows about your brother. i dont know the jail rule thingy but i think he should have been able to come. be happy soon! :heart:

  7. Ashley – Jul 30, 2005 at 12:02

    I’m so sorry to hear about your grandfather. I know exactly how it feels, I’ve lost both of mine. One very much like a second father to me.

    *big hugs*

  8. CJP – Jul 31, 2005 at 19:14

    I’m really sorry Jen… let me know if there’s anything I can do, okay?

  9. Angela – Aug 1, 2005 at 03:35

    I’m sorry for your loss hun. Tpo cheer up maybe try remembering that he wouldn’t want you to be mourning him. He’d want you to be celebrating his life and yours instead.

Comments are closed.

Funeral home

July 27

I want to thank everyone that left/emailed really nice comments to me. It meant a lot. I miss my grandfather so much. It still doesn’t seem real. I sat at the funeral home with a blank face most of the time. I didn’t cry very much but just sat there. Maybe I would feel better if I did just cry but I can’t. I don’t cry very much. The service was very nice. I think my grandfather would have really liked it. He was buried in a white t-shirt, blue jeans and a ballcap. He looked like papaw but in a way he didn’t. It’s hard to really put it in to words.

My brother didn’t even get out of jail for it. Most of the time they will let you out for 72 hours and then make you go back. He didn’t get to even say goodbye. I think it has been almost 3 years since Raymond had seen papaw. :frown: I hate that for my brother. The last time I seen him was father’s day. I didn’t seem that long ago. I remember kissing him on the cheek and telling him I loved him before Keith and I left. 😐

I need to talk about something happier if not I will be sad forever. We finally got our tax check in. We bought ourselves some clothes that we needed very bad. We paid on some bills and we still have money to move in the next month or so. Keith is finally full-time now and everything seems well. We are doing good besides the funeral. Our lives are starting to fall into place. That makes me smile.

Judy took me to the Heath Department again to change birth control. The pills they put me on made me sick. They said it might of been since I’m so small. So, now I am trying this thing called NuvaRing. It looks really neat. I haven’t tried it out yet because I have to wait the Sunday after my period to use it. It is 99.7% effect with perfect use. The same as the pill. This is pretty good. I think. It looks like a rubber band and you have to keep it in for 3 weeks and then take it out the last week (the week of your period). Then I go back each month and get a new one. I think I will like it. All I can do is try, right?

Well, I am off. I have a lot of house cleaning to do. Being away for 3 days, you can really tell. Nathan and Keith did try. Which I am very greatful for.

This entry was posted on Wednesday July 27th, 2005 at 6:40 pm with the tags: . You can view the comment feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.

  1. krazykymn – Jul 28, 2005 at 00:30

    awww.I’m so sorry. I was wondering why i haven’t seen you online in awhile.

  2. smilebluemonday – Jul 28, 2005 at 05:26

    i’m glad you’re ok now. and that’s a bummer about your brother.

    hope the new birth control works!

  3. heavensoverated – Jul 30, 2005 at 01:51

    oh honey *tight tight hugs* i’m so sorry. Robert read this entry to me right after you posted it (with his jaw hanging open and a horrified look on his face—he sends his condolences, heh) but i still don’t really know what to say.

Comments are closed.