Archive for June, 2008

Secret Lyric Game

June 30

This is a little game I made up. Kind of like the Secret Game. You take lyrics and everyone tries to guess which lyrics are for them. Here goes:

and this is how it feels. . .
as we go on, we remember
all the times we, had together
and as our lives change
come whatever
we will still be friends forever

Graduation Friends Forever –Vitamin C

We’re just two lost souls
Swimming in a fish bowl,
Year after year,
Running over the same old ground.
What have we found?
The same old fears.

Wish You Were Here –Pink Floyd

I really feel
That I’m losing my best friend
I can’t believe
This could be the end

Don’t Speak –No Doubt

Sweet 16 today
She’s looking like her mama a little more everyday
One part woman, the other part girl.
To perfume and make-up from ribbons and curls
Trying her wings out in a great big world.

Butterfly Kisses –Bob Carlisle

I kissed a girl and I liked it
The taste of her cherry chap stick
I kissed a girl just to try it
I hope my boyfriend don’t mind it

I Kissed A Girl –Katy Perry

Would you look at her
She looks at me
Shes got me thinking about her constantly
But she don’t know how I feel
And as she carries on without a doubt
I wonder if shes figured out
I’m crazy for this girl

Crazy for This Girl to –Evan And Jaron

Go a head and guess. I bet you won’t know. lol You might. 🙂 Hope you like this game.

Baby mama drama

June 25

Let’s say you have the person in your life. He is your world. Let’s call him Bunny. Okay, Bunny has girl that may or may not be pregnant. Let’s call her Baby Mama. Baby Mama and Bunny was together as a couple around a year, but lived together for a total of three years. One night before Bunny gets with new girl. Bunny and Baby Mama happen to hook up. Maybe or maybe not a baby was made.

Bunny tries to give Baby Mama every option in the world to show him the truth. To let him be apart of this wonderful world of baby. She clams to be around 5 1/2 months or so. She will not show proof, will not let him go to the doctor with her. He tries to be part of her life, but she always finds away to make sure she can’t meet up with him or starts drama or doesn’t show up. She tries to make him look bad. Telling everyone he doesn’t want to be part of his child’s life or telling everyone he doesn’t care but I know what goes on. He tries.

She clams to be pregnant but then turns around and gets tattoos, smokes and has sex with random guys. Hello? Really? Come on now! I mean, what pregnant mother does these things if she cared or was really pregnant. She isn’t pregnant. Well, as far as we know. If she is, OMG, I don’t even what to know what she is really doing.

I don’t understand. If you are pregnant, wouldn’t you, just show proof. Wouldn’t it be easy to show proof. If it wasn’t a problem.

Why keep holding on? He doesn’t want you and hasn’t wanted you in a good while. I hope Baby Mama gets it together if she really is. For her sake and the baby’s.

Crazy, crazy baby mama drama.

Would you want to watch it?

June 22

I randomly think about the good and bad times. The moments that make us, well, us. The moments that in an instant will either break us or make us the person we are today. The moment that changed everything about our lives. The one choice that lead us to the path we are today. I think about what moment, what choice, what help make us make this choice, this decision. I wonder how or why we got the conclusion we did.

I randomly think about the choices that have got me to this point in my life. Not just everyone else, but me. It is hard for me to believe I was married for 3 years. It is even harder for me to believe I was with Cody for almost a year. Not hard because it was bad but over all. It is hard for me to believe just over 4 years of my life is gone. . .and I am scared if I blink, another 4 years will be gone. . .If I fall a sleep, I will a wake an old women. Scared of what will lay a head of me.

My father told me as a child I was wishing my life way. You wish to be 16, then 18, then 21 before you know it, you blink your 40. I am starting to believe that. My weeks seem to be getting shorter and my months seem to fly by. I tell myself this is all because I’m so busy. I really, don’t think that it is. I think it is because of my age. I have already wished all my years way. Now time is speeding up. I remember as a kid, the summers would last forever. Our two week breaks would never end. Weekends lasted longer then just a few moments. I still get the two day weekends. They are over before I know it.

Don’t get me wrong, I am not wishing to move time, I’m not wanting to change my past and I truly will never regret my past. Cody once told me, If your life was a movie, would you want to watch it?

Then it hit me, how true is that. Why live life any other way? I imagine when my life is over, when it is all said and done with sitting there watching my life. This beautiful movie, this work of art. I can imagine myself laughing, turning red A LOT, crying, wanting to change the channel but never ever taking back anything, not one moment. Never changing a thing.

I truly believe I am happy with these choices. I truly believe that I am a wonderful person. With all my flaws, imperfectness, with all of my downsides. I am truly a beautiful person and I feel like it has taken me years to finally see that. I am what ever you say I am, but I know what I am.


June 21
  • What is one thing about you that you hate? Nothing.
  • What is one thing about you that you love? Everything.
  • If you had to change one thing about you what would it be and why? I wouldn’t change anything. Why would you? You are who you are for a reason.
  • What is one word that you would use to define yourself? Colorful.
  • Imagine what you would look like in a perfect world…what do you look like? Like me!
  • Thanks: Friday5

I bet you think this blog is about you, don’t you?

June 16

I bet you think this blog is about you, don’t you?

His mother told me, “If he is suppose to leave you alone, leave him alone!!!!”. I believe I am not suppose to write an entry about whoever I want when ever I want. Let me get this right. I, who pays for the domain, who lives in the land of the free, can’t write a simple goodbye note. Something that was meant just to get how I felt about, out in the open. Wasn’t like I wrote something bad. Wasn’t like I wrote something mean. I simply wrote. Goodbye. That is it. Nothing more, nothing less. I could have been a bitch but I didn’t. I could have said so much more but I didn’t. I won’t. I am a bigger person than that.

I don’t believe I got the note that said I couldn’t write whatever I wanted to write. I don’t really remember that. Damn it. I must get more note pads to write on. But wait, remember, I was the one with a good job, a place to live and a new car. Forgive me for working to get everything I have. Forgive me for carrying everyone else’s load for so long. Forgive me.

I feel as if I can look be on all this and become a better person. I don’t regret the past year, I don’t regret my past 4 years. I am who I am because of everything. I will have to rise up be on the hurt and pain. I will have to find ways of forgiving. Never forgetting but always forgiving. Karma finds a way around to everything. Good or bad.

Remember, don’t judge anyone. Everyone is working on a harder battle. I don’t understand people. Like they have a fucking right to judge anyone or anything. As if they are better or even worse. I know I have made mistakes. I know I’m not and never will be perfect. This is something some people will never get out of their head. I have worked my butt off for as long as I can remember. And I will be damned if a snot nosed little brat is going to bring me down because of it. Fine.

Remember, you are the one that said “If you think your ready, then fucking bring it.” It will be. It will be.