Overwhelmed

Daily life
09/22/2010

I have been aiming to blog forever. I have no real reason why I haven’t done so sooner. I have had time, I have had subjects I wanted to talk about, and so forth and so on but truly, I haven’t because I couldn’t muster the energy to do it.

The last few months have been very trying physically, mentally, and emotionally. I have started my depression medications back which has helped a little bit but a lot of it really is just pushing myself forward. Trying not to step backwards in this battle.

I twittered a while back saying “Depression is such a hard fight. I feel like I am fighting a battle I will never win.” and I feel that way 99% most of the time because of the fact as soon as I think it is getting better, it kicks me down again.

I feel so overwhelmed due to the fact, I am a full time college student now (by the way, I am very happy and proud of), a home owner (which means no land lord to call if something goes wrong), working part-time (sometimes closer to full time) and trying to have a social life. . .well, kind of a social life. The closest to one as I want to get at this moment in time. That’s a lot on my plate right now for one single person. I don’t have someone to share my stress with or help me with the things I need to get done or to even share anything with. I’m doing it alone.

I have been very lucky that my father and one of his friends has been doing the major things that need to be done outside to my home. Like building me a new front deck and they fixed my back one. We have the whole outside cleaned up. And random fact: I totally found a stop sign under my trailer. How awesome!?! 😀

Anyway, I do have more I want to write but I am lost for words at the moment. I am working on a new layout finally. I will be getting my new laptop either tonight or tomorrow. I am selling my 15.6″ laptop and getting a netbook since I have a desktop too.