Aside

Nice things

We have nice things because we work hard and save money. And when get finally get enough money we buy what we want. I price check for weeks and I look every way in the world to save money. In doing so, we get good deals and there for have nice things. Why should we be sorry for this?

This blog entry comes about because of Kyle’s sister. I love her, really I do. I don’t say anything about it much but it does bother me. Every dime she gets she spends. And normally doesn’t have anything to show for it. Kyle and I got school money. We got enough back from grants that we was able to buy him a new Jeep (year 2000) but new to us. 😀 A new TV for our living room and a bed frame. We shopped wisely and doing so saved a lot of money. We all three got school money at the same time. She already has asked to borrow money. She works and her boyfriend works. Both make pretty good money, more then Kyle does. And we keep our bills paid but she is already asking to borrow money because she loaned hers out and spend it. WTF? I don’t think so.

Because you are money stupid doesn’t mean we are stupid too. Family or not, I don’t think so. :blah:

On the plus side, we got a new 4×4 Jeep this week, last week a new 55″ flat screen TV (thanks hhgreg sales) and a new bed frame. Over all been a good two weeks.

Aside

Consequences of misfortune

Acceptance of what has happened is the first step to overcoming the consequences of any misfortune.

Okay, last night early morning I stated I was going to blog about something that has been bothering me for a couple of weeks now. This being my ex Cody his mother Branda is dating a sex offender. This wouldn’t be nearly as bad if this sex offender wasn’t caught with “POSS W/INT TO PROMOTE CHILD PORNOGRAPHY”. And to even add more fuel to the fire, Branda has known this whole time of dating him. (Over 3 years now) She has let this man around her children and her grandchild which isn’t even a year old yet. It get’s worse; this man had pictures of children as young as six and seven years old on his computer. I looked over all the court records I could find, which seems to be all of them and I am horrified about this. Not only because of lack of parenting skills, but also the fact she doesn’t seem to have a problem with this fact. She is okay with this. And to make it even creeper, she also dresses in “cute” outfits for him. Right now, her FB page has her dressed as a lollipop girl. Does she not see this feeds his problem? I can’t believe as a mother she doesn’t want to protect her children. Her response is this “If I thought you guys (her children) was in any danger I would have said something.” My point of view is, why even temp it. Why even let your children get influence by a man that has this past?

In the court documents it stated he sent pictures of these children to other people, with subject titles “This is me and my niece, Sky.” Within these pictures was a man having sex with a child/pre-teen/teenager. What is okay about this? He claims that he was trying to catch someone doing this. Why on earth would you send pictures like that to other people? He didn’t have one but 17 pictures of children ranging from the age of six or seven to teenagers, maybe the age of 15 or 16. This is a very sick man. It turns my stomach to knots thinking about this. To think I ate meals with this man, been to his house, him in my house. AND I was almost family with this man.

You have to be kidding me? That’s all I could say when I found all this out. I am still almost speechless about it. I know this information because I have remain friends with Carrie, Cody’s step-mother and his father. As a father Chris is out raged, because she had the nerve to try to fight for custody for those boys to live with her and that man. How on God’s green earth can you think that is okay? I am glad Chris is taking the steps to protect his children because she isn’t; it looks like. She thinks it is completely okay and can’t figure out why everyone is upset about it. Yet again, I am repeating myself, are you kidding me? I just can’t picture that being okay in any situation.

People never seem to surprise me. And the kids are mad at Chris and Carrie. I’m not even sure why. They said that it isn’t just causing trouble for Branda’s boyfriend but also her. Well, sometimes, you have to deal with the consequences of your actions. Her consequences for letting someone like that around her children and thinking it is okay might be losing her children forever. And I don’t see how that would be a problem at this point. I don’t see how that would be a bad thing.

Okay, I have a ton more to say but I might start repeating myself. Not sure how to end this but I hope for Chris and Carrie this can be settled like adults and not cause anymore problems then what it has but I don’t see that happening due to the fact, the children (Cody, Micki, Rowdy and Cortland) are so bad about blaming others for actions that themselves has done and not handling there own consequences and seeing both sides without being biased. Everyone in that family besides Chris and Carrie will stab someone in the back and take sweet to their face and because of this, they agree with Chris today and tomorrow their mother is right. I feel very sorry for this family. They will never grow as people because of this. They will be stuck in this ugly cycle.

Aside

More entries

As a result of me trying to blog more I have been scheduling more entries. Most of the entries that I am scheduling are picture memes but never the less they are entries about things I love or have something to do with. I am trying to blog at least every other day or so. I know, I really don’t have that much to say but really I do. Sometimes I fear about blogging due to someone finding my blog. I do have my real name on here and Google pulls my stuff very quickly now a days. Thanks Google. 😉

I have a couple things I am going to blog about shortly. Not tonight because well, I’m tired but I will leave you with a hint of it. The hint will be this; a post I made on Google+ tonight.

Someone’s status on facebook read “So tired of bitches in my life. F@#k off!” and my first thought was to type “Some bitches don’t need to date sex offender while children in the home.” But I didn’t because I don’t cause drama on Facebook. lol

Now I know you want to come back for more. Hahaha. <- That was suppose to be in a evil laugh. I'm just saying. BTW, I am normally not a drama queen but I do have a lot to say about this one subject that has to deal with this person and her family. Only because I was so close to being apart of this family. Does that make sense? Well, I am rambling and it’s 1am. I think my bed is calling my name, very soon.

Aside

My relationship

One day you’re going to wake up and realize how much you care for her and when that day comes she’ll be waking up next to the guy that already knows.

Relationships are so hard to sum up. So many words to use to say what happen in the past and what you wanted for the future. My relationship with Cody wasn’t all bad. We had fun times but we did have a lot of bad times. I found out in the past two years he cheated on me twice. Once before we moved in together again in August 2009 and the second time was within 48 hours of him being home from Basic training/AIT. And this is just what he has told me, that doesn’t include if he has done it any other times and I just don’t know about it.

I wish I could say I forgive him for these actions because I don’t yet. I know he is still hanging out and talking with the girl he cheated on me with. He doesn’t seem to mind and nor does she. He told me after I found out he would be willing to stop talking to her. He would work it out. He doesn’t want that. Because if he did, he would have stopped. In the end, I guess she was worth it. I guess what we had didn’t matter in the end because it wasn’t enough. It was never enough.

She can have him. I won’t be made a fool again. Let her found out about his mood swings and angry issues. Let her pay his way.

He came and got the last of his stuff today. He kept saying over the past few days he wanted to at least be friends. If I needed him, to call. Whatever, he wasn’t here for me when I did need him while we were dating, why would I call when I need him now?

He says he wants to be friends. “We can still be friends” is like “your dog is dead, but you can still keep it” Is how that makes me feel. You know? Why would I want to watch him be happy with this other girl? I do want him happy, this I am not saying. I just don’t want to watch it. It hurts still. Maybe later on but right now. I hurts so bad. Each day is better than the last.

And I know with time it will all heal. I will move on with my life. I have too. I can’t sit around hoping something will happen because if it hasn’t worked in all the times we tried and he is still trying to be with other people, he can have them. I am tired of being hurt all the time. I deserve better! And I really wished he could have been the man to make all my dreams come true. At one time I believed that. I think we have a connection that I have never had with anyone and that is what is making all this so hard.

I have been able to get up, walk away from anyone in my life. Never had a problem, him. He is a problem. I don’t know why. He is one of the few people that can either brighten my world with a look or make my life living hell with a touch. It’s crazy. And at one time I could have done the same to him.

So, I guess Cody and I are really over. Funny how within 24 hours of him being home, my world fell a part. That’s okay, I will pick up the pieces, like I always do. I was making it before him and I will make it after him. He is just one man. He isn’t a god. He is who he is. I can’t change that and we tried to make it work. At least we can say that.

Aside

Maybe to happy

I hate people that only post about happy things in their blog. I know it’s their blog but no one is that happy all the time, no matter what. Life isn’t perfect and I know life is hard. But I can’t stand to read a blog that is happy all the time. Just like people, I can’t stand to be around people that act happy all the time. It’s not natural. It’s not healthy.

/end rant

Anyways, the cave tour went great even if I was sick. I woke up with a fever of about 103 degrees, almost 104. Turns out I had Strep throat. I got a Z pack which is a 7 days wroth of antibiotic. I started them Friday afternoon. By Saturday I felt a little better. Not where I should be but enough we went a head and did the cave tour. It was nice to go out with the family. We went to Long John’s and ate. So nice to get real food in me. I didn’t eat one bit of real food Friday. Jello and ice cream for me.

Today I am taking Meadow to the Mall / Wal-Mart / Deals and anywhere else that baby wants to go for her birthday. She turns 10 tomorrow. She spent the night with me last night. She mainly played dress up games on the computer. And watch TV. After we get back from Bowling Green, we are going up to mom’s to eat and have cake. :yay cake:

On an even brighter note, Cody comes home in 18 days! Okay, I must go get out of my pjs and in to real clothes. We are heading out soon. Meadow is in the shower now.